I am having a hard time with some upcoming births with the thought always present in my mind that if I'd not miscarried at Thanksgiving, I'd be the one having my home-visit, setting up the pool, and trying to mentally prepare myself for labor. Instead, I'm keeping myself busier than is healthy, feeling constantly run down, and preparing for another run of births. I'm sure I'll be feeling the same way come February as I'm watching those ladies lift their babies up to their chests and feeling like my time will never come. I've been to 20 births this year already and some how, it feels like it's getting harder.
Things just feel stagnant in my body right now. I had an incredibly heavy period this month, way worse than it's been in a very long time, and I was at a birth which always makes me cramp anyway. I thought about asking for an epidural, hah.
Anyway, I'm loving this song right now (and the brilliant Netflix tv show it was written for). "Taking steps is easy, standing still is hard." <3 br="" nbsp=""> 3>